so sick

first post for this month. if anyone still reads this blog, the reason why i haven't been blogging lately is crystal clear to you.
been busy with work. yes, WORK. training, to be exact. training, but still in a work-like environment. work-like situation. work-like pressure. everything work Work WORK. *so sick of it*
work's been (quite) kind to me. been placed in cold kitchen for the first month. have a good and nice head chef to teach me the ropes. grateful for everything so far actually. just gotta stay positive. not been a good time to be positive. need to A.S.A.P. haha
so glad to finally know when my off-day for this week is. it's on a Wednesday. was supposed to be today, but since my chef "forgot" to print out my duty roster i ended up working today and also tomorrow. was hoping he would move my off-day to tomorrow, and in the end he says it's on Wednesday. *grumble grumble*
anyways life goes on. in another story, my co-worker in my kitchen asked if i could trade shifts with him. he claims he wants to take the morning shift so that he can make good his promise to his friends to join them for badminton. i was reluctant to do so, but in the end, being the nice shithead i am, i agreed. this means that instead of me taking the 9 to 5 shift (which i always craved) i end up doing the 3 to 11 shift. yay...another long night standing alone and doing nothing at the cold kitchen section at the dinner buffet... NOT.
i should learn to be helpful without compromising my own happiness. i shouldn't always be so nice to people. should put myself first sometimes. sick of being pushed around...
as i'm typing this i just read that former British Prime Minister Baroness Margaret Thatcher has passed away aged 87 due to a stroke. though not related to her or not a Brit, i am deeply shocked to be reading this. sad sad time...
lately i have been reading my old friend Eu Chuan's blog, and i am amazed by his poetic blog posts. love reading his blog. i am so inspired! God bless him. here below is an extract from his blog, a new post. ENJOY! :


There are certain things I wished never happened,
certain things I'm glad happened, despite the pain.
And there are those things that happened,
for which I have paid a heavy price.

For what its worth, and in a way,
I'm happy at what transpired.
I suffer, I hated the pain,
but I learnt.

Like so many new beginnings,
it all seems so obscure and confusing.
In actuality, to conclude a chapter,
sometimes involves something as simple as letting go.

For so many times and so long now,
I've fought myself, struggled and forced.
Trying to find a balance, or the direction,
over thinking, over feeling, over whelmed.

Turns out, its as simple as letting go.
Letting yourself accept the fact, the past, the ghosts,
and finally look upon it as lesson learnt.
I'm at peace with myself now.

In my own way,
I still hold on to the hopes and aspirations.
I still care and I still delve.
But, I let go.

No anticipating,
no expecting,
no obsessing.
Simple, just letting go.