You are the reason

Here's on the street
A tear in the seam
Of pleasure and pain
Life carries on
A cloak of deceit
Brings honour to shame
But the voice I used to know
Is the one I can't let go

You are the reason
My faith in tomorrow
A distant horizon
The one I must follow
You are the first, you are the last

I'll help you to see
The light in the dark
The sun through the rain
Until you are free
And facing the truth
That words can't explain
But the truth I think you know
I could never let you go

You are the future from the past
You are the spell that has been cast...

26.4.2013

This used to be my playground
This used to be my childhood dream
This used to be the place I ran to
Whenever I was in need
Of a friend
Why did it have to end
And why do they always say

Don't look back
Keep your head held high
Don't ask them why
Because life is short
And before you know
You're feeling old
And your heart is breaking
Don't hold on to the past
Well that's too much to ask

Live and learn
Well the years they flew
And we never knew
We were foolish then
We would never tire
And that little fire
Is still alive in me
It will never go away
Can't say goodbye to yesterday

No regrets
But I wish that you
Were here with me
Well then there's hope yet
I can see your face
In our secret place
You're not just a memory
Say goodbye to yesterday
Those are words I'll never say

This used to be our playground
This used to be our great escape
This used to be the place we ran to
This used to be our secret hiding place

This used to be our playground
This used to be our childhood dream
This used to be the place we ran to
The best things in life are always free
Wishing you were here with me

Wait for me...

I need to talk with you again
Why did you go away
All that time together
This feels like yesterday
I never thought I'd see
A single day without you
The things we take for granted
We can sometimes lose

And if I promise not to feel this pain
Will I see you again?
Will I see you again...

'Cause time will pass me by
Maybe I'll never learn to smile
But I know I'll make it through
If you wait for me
And all the tears I cry
No matter how I try
They'll never bring you home to me
Won't you wait for me
In heaven...

Do you remember how it was
When we never seemed to care
Days went by so quickly
'Cause I thought you'd always be there
And it's hard to let you go
Though I know that I must try
I feel like I've been cheated
'Cause we never said goodbye

And if I promise not to feel this pain
Will I see you again?
Will I see you again...

Because I miss you so
And I need to know
Will you wait for me?

'Cause time will pass me by
Maybe I'll never learn to smile
But I know I'll make it through
If you wait for me (Say you'll wait for me)
And all the tears I cry (all the tears I cry)
No matter how I try (how I try)
They'll never bring you home to me
Won't you wait for me

'Cause time will pass me by
Maybe I'll never learn to smile
But I know I'll make it through
If you wait for me...

what a treat!

FINALLY...my off day is here! TODAY! *happy*

after working EIGHT days straight since my last off day i finally get to take a break.
damn glad it's here... i know that work is like that, but sometimes we do need to a break too. we're only human after all.

woke up early (despite being an off day i am not the type who likes to sleep in. DUNNO WHY.) to do some laundry, have an early breakfast, and now currently (also wasting time?) in an Internet cafe using the Net. it's not that i like to frequent this Internet cafes and all, but since i have got no Internet connection at home i guess i have no other options...

right now i kinda am transfixed on this song by Pitbull, Flo-Rida, and a bunch of other fellows called 'Boom, Shake, Drop'. i don't usually like to listen to such music, but this one is catchy. it uses a part of 'Satisfaction' by Benny Benassi, which makes it even nicer. great song...

after this i have no idea what i want to do. haven't really planned anything special to do today. wanted to go take a bus down to Komtar to get a friend something but i guess i am not in a rush to buy it. can go next week. i want to stay around my area here for today. maybe i will buy the gift next week during my next off day...

last Monday i went down town and walked into this quaint second-hand items shop. browsed through the stuff sold there. wasn't impressed with the limited choices, but hey, it's just a second-hand shop; what could be exciting there right? anyway i looked through their books rack, and found 'Twenties Girl' by Sophie Kinsella (most famously recognized for 'Confessions Of A Shopaholic')! finally...something worth buying. and only going for RM8! i didn't have to think twice! i duly paid for it and went home a happy man. i know the book has been out for many years already, but i read these kinds of novels sporadically so technically speaking i am a 'part-time' reader, so it doesn't have to be the latest book that i must read. as long as 1)i haven't read it before and 2)the price is right then i will buy it. after all, it did bring back memories of 2009, when a former classmate and dear friend Alicia used to love reading Kinsella's books and urged me to read some too. i first read 'Confessions Of A Shopaholic' along with other titles by the same author, and from there onwards i was hooked! great books... so glad for life's little mercies... thanks be to God for bringing these kind of people into my life. really made a big difference in my life...

righty-o then... till next time! XOXO

M

good mood

hello!
i am in quite a good mood today. despite having work (shift was 9am to 5pm) i rather enjoyed my day at work.
WHY? usually you'd expect to hear grouses regarding work, but i had fun today. fun part #1- fun as in my head chef didn't turn up (meaning less strenuous work), this meaning i only did "light" work given by the cook in the cold kitchen. she didn't give me such difficult stuff to do, just the usual making of three types of sandwiches a day and doing mise en place for the next day.
AND regarding those three types of sandwiches...i did them all before 1 o'clock! (if i am not mistaken, since i joined the cold kitchen crew today is the second time i have completed the three types of sandwiches before 1 o'clock.) i am extremely proud of this, because i usually get criticized for being slow. but then again, maybe i didn't get scolded by chef Hanisah today because my head chef wasn't here. maybe... haha
but still, i am proud of my "achievement" today. heh heh

fun part #2- on Saturday i asked my head chef if i could take Monday off as my off-day, and he agreed to switch my off-day from Wednesday to Monday, which is tomorrow. good! tomorrow i can go out with my housemates/friends to Gurney Plaza to do some shopping and relax after the past few days of hard work. glad that my request was granted. was quite afraid that he would turn it down. reason why i decided to switch my off-day to tomorrow is so that i can hang out with my friends. we get different off-days, so it's hard to hang out with the said different days. totally looking forward to tomorrow!

had dinner at a nearby cafe with housemates Henry and Sam. watched the first half of Newcastle vs Sunderland. Sunderland leading by 1 goal to nil. am in an Internet cafe now. still no internet for my house, so the Internet cafe will have to do. planning to waste time here till 9 o'clock, when Stoke play Manchester United. plan to watch that at the mamak just opposite the internet cafe. ahh...what a relaxing Sunday night... no worries...

that's all for now. I WILL BE BACK. hahahahahahaha bye xoxo

Friday grouses

salutations!
my shift today is from 3pm to 11pm, so here i am, blogging at my nearby internet cafe while i have the time...
training's been okay. nothing special. but i suppose shit's just getting real.
yesterday my chef kinda like scolded me for being slow in making sandwiches.
okay, so i am a bit slow. but slow as in cautious as to not make mistakes...not that slow as in lazy.
but he won't understand. but then again, this IS the working life. EVERYTHING is fast-paced in the working world. zzz
so i watched The Perks Of Being A Wallflower yesterday. it was beautiful. great movie. and no, i didn't just watch it for Emma Watson okay? haha...
right. got to go home and get ready for work later. gonna leave with this parting words:

"Now we're torn, torn, torn apart, there's nothing we can do.

Just let me go, we'll meet again soon.

Now wait, wait, wait for me, please hang around.

I'll see you when I fall asleep." 

- Little Talks by Of Monsters and Men

ciao peeps! xoxo

so sick

first post for this month. if anyone still reads this blog, the reason why i haven't been blogging lately is crystal clear to you.
been busy with work. yes, WORK. training, to be exact. training, but still in a work-like environment. work-like situation. work-like pressure. everything work Work WORK. *so sick of it*
work's been (quite) kind to me. been placed in cold kitchen for the first month. have a good and nice head chef to teach me the ropes. grateful for everything so far actually. just gotta stay positive. not been a good time to be positive. need to A.S.A.P. haha
so glad to finally know when my off-day for this week is. it's on a Wednesday. was supposed to be today, but since my chef "forgot" to print out my duty roster i ended up working today and also tomorrow. was hoping he would move my off-day to tomorrow, and in the end he says it's on Wednesday. *grumble grumble*
anyways life goes on. in another story, my co-worker in my kitchen asked if i could trade shifts with him. he claims he wants to take the morning shift so that he can make good his promise to his friends to join them for badminton. i was reluctant to do so, but in the end, being the nice shithead i am, i agreed. this means that instead of me taking the 9 to 5 shift (which i always craved) i end up doing the 3 to 11 shift. yay...another long night standing alone and doing nothing at the cold kitchen section at the dinner buffet... NOT.
i should learn to be helpful without compromising my own happiness. i shouldn't always be so nice to people. should put myself first sometimes. sick of being pushed around...
as i'm typing this i just read that former British Prime Minister Baroness Margaret Thatcher has passed away aged 87 due to a stroke. though not related to her or not a Brit, i am deeply shocked to be reading this. sad sad time...
lately i have been reading my old friend Eu Chuan's blog, and i am amazed by his poetic blog posts. love reading his blog. i am so inspired! God bless him. here below is an extract from his blog, a new post. ENJOY! :


There are certain things I wished never happened,
certain things I'm glad happened, despite the pain.
And there are those things that happened,
for which I have paid a heavy price.

For what its worth, and in a way,
I'm happy at what transpired.
I suffer, I hated the pain,
but I learnt.

Like so many new beginnings,
it all seems so obscure and confusing.
In actuality, to conclude a chapter,
sometimes involves something as simple as letting go.

For so many times and so long now,
I've fought myself, struggled and forced.
Trying to find a balance, or the direction,
over thinking, over feeling, over whelmed.

Turns out, its as simple as letting go.
Letting yourself accept the fact, the past, the ghosts,
and finally look upon it as lesson learnt.
I'm at peace with myself now.

In my own way,
I still hold on to the hopes and aspirations.
I still care and I still delve.
But, I let go.

No anticipating,
no expecting,
no obsessing.
Simple, just letting go.